F bombs on aisle nine

On Mother's Day I stopped into Shaw's to pick up the last bunch of flowers I would ever buy my grandmother. 

I chose tulips for Nanny and decided my mom might like some miniature purple roses in dainty little tins.  They were so impossibly pretty, I hoped maybe they'd cheer her up.  Although, did a few of the roses look wilted?  I popped my head around the corner and discovered a woman working behind the flower area, putting together arrangements.  She was having a conversation with an elderly man.  They weren't talking flowers, mainly they were just shooting the breeze.

I made myself visible, my arms bulging with bags and plants and flowers, but the woman still wouldn't acknowledge me.

I was running late.  Immediate action was necessary.  "Excuse me, I'm sorry to interrupt, but I just have a quick question about these flowers..."

BAD choice, Odd Broad.  The old buck went effing ballistic.  Now that I had a good look at him, I did notice he was kind of off his rocker.  He was wearing a Yankees baseball cap and when he opened his mouth to yell at me I saw he was missing some teeth. 

"You just interrupted us!  How dare you!  You rude, fucking, bitch!"

Awesome.

The flower woman looked totally nonplussed.  "That's not nice, she said 'excuse me'..."

"I don't care!  I was talking and she interrupted me!  She's a bitch!"  He leveled his wild eyes back on mine.  "YOU are a BITCH!"

As there appeared to be a brief window of opportunity in between the scolding, I decided it might be a nice time to pose my question.  "Do these flowers look wilted?"  The woman assured me that she'd just gotten the roses in the day prior, so they were very fresh, and I was on my merry way.  The old devil was still railing, going on about what a horrible bitch I was. 

I knew this poor soul probably had a touch of the dementia, but I'm not going to lie; his impromptu nastiness made my eyes sting with a moisture that was entirely involuntary.  Let's face it, I was already in a somber mood to begin with.  "Thank you," I said to the woman.  "Have a nice day," I said to the old dickhead.  It figured he was a Yankees fan. 

As I walked away I could hear them talking, and the old man was already regretting his outburst.  A second later he came around the corner and repented.  "You did say excuse me; I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you a bitch, that was wrong of me."

"That's okay, sir.  It's alright."

He then disappeared behind the wall and I heard his friend tell him she was proud of him and that it was very nice of him to have apologized.

Nobody around had witnessed this oddity, save me, flower lady and old Yankee dude.  I glanced about to see if there wasn't some stranger I could roll my eyes at, laugh, and say, "Can you believe it?  Never a dull moment," that sort of thing.  But my sudden need to commiserate only made me appear creepy.  A woman dressed in traditional Indian garb actually hurried away from me with her shopping cart.

I walked home, the sun beating down on me.  I was starting to sweat.  On the way, I passed a man begging for spare change who said, "Nice flowers." 

Thanks.

That was the last day I saw Nan alive.  I put the tulips on top of her television set; she'd gotten so many flowers she was running out of table space.  I don't think she knew who I was, so I never really got to say goodbye.  I wanted a moment alone with her, to tell her...I don't even know what.  Anyway, I never got the chance.  So I'm going to tell her now, on the world wide web: You made me laugh.  You were beautiful and brave, and I always wanted to make you proud.  You were a constant, irreplaceable staple in my life, and now you're gone, and a part of me just can't believe it.

And...Nanny, an old man called me a bitch on Mother's Day, at the grocery store.  Can you believe it?

Comments

[Stacey]

You brake my heart, OB. I am POSITIVE you made her proud. xxxooo

and, yes, it DOES figure that he was a Yankee fan. =)

[Weinerdog]

Now you've made me cry....at work.
I didn't get my own moment alone either, I had to share with Traci.
xoxo

[the odd broad]

XOXO

[Tanya]

I am so sorry for your loss, and I'm sure she was beyond proud of you, what you've accomplished and all the smiles you gave her :)

[the odd broad]

Thanks, Tanya xoxo