Glistening in the urban tropics

It's that time of year again.  It's 9:26 am and I'm halfway to the subway station when I realize my arms are glistening with a glittery, sweaty film.  Glittery, because my Marc Jacobs body lotion happens to contain glitter.  Sweaty, because not only is the temperature some 80 plus degrees, but the ungodly humidity is making New York feel as if it's sizzling inside a wood burning pizza oven.  The city is steaming in its own special, rank juices.  (Parfum de urine!)

Sweaty, unladylike arms is definitely not the look I was aiming for this summer, but it seems I have little alternative.  And let's face it, a bit of sweat on my arms is the least of my worries.  The other morning I relinquished my seat on the subway during rush hour because I realized my bum was feeling a little... sticky under my sundress.  How would that look when I got up to exit the train?  Would my fellow straphangers stare?  Would the screaming toddler in his stroller point and throw his SpongeBob at me?  Soon I began thinking of the countless commuters who sit their own sweaty asses down upon those gritty subway seats, and the many crackheads who stretch out and nap upon those seats.  I wondered if perhaps I couldn't catch something undesirable through my sweat compromised, flimsy cotton ensemble.  (You've heard those myths about picking up nasty things from a toilet seat?  Well, how's about a subway seat, hmmm?)

I'm aware these fears are unfounded and completely mental.  I blame the humidity.

My hubby the California boy is a big advocate for air conditioning.  He loves it, he rallies for it!  He is astounded by the lack of central air in homes on the east coast.  It's not that I myself don't also enjoy the cool blast of a heavenly A/C, but I feel there's a time and place.  I don't like our apartment being shut up like a bat cave.  I don't like not being able to hear if an intruder has entered our apartment and is rifling through the refrigerator and brushing his teeth with my toothbrush.  I long to hear civilization bustling outside on the streets; the old woman who sifts through our recycling on Thursday evenings, our neighbors with their boisterous, atrocious laughter.  (Have I told you we live next door to bad laughers?  They find everything hilarious, simply hilarious!) 

Air conditioning units are lovely but that cooped up silent feeling kind of creeps me out. 

I haven't even mentioned the electricity bill.  For June alone ours was $150, and this was after practicing strict electrical restraint.  These days our apartment is a veritable wattage free for all!  I shudder to think of the impending bills for July and August.  Here's to you, ConEd!

Hubby just got home so it's time to turn on the A/C.  What can I say, it makes the guy happy.

Stay cool, Dear Reader!  xoxo
 

Comments

[Weinerdog]

Your subway fears are NOT unfounded, I read in the Post that you should NEVER sit on one of those wooden benches in the subway stations because they contain (are you ready?)........BEDBUGS!!!!!!!
No word of a lie!!!!! So,I know the seats ON the trains are plastic, but well think about it!

[The Odd Broad]

Interesting...kind of wish I hadn't sat on the wooden bench yesterday morning! Gross!!

[Karen]

Oh my gosh! I thought I was the only one with a huge electric bill. Ours was $164 this month. I'm sitting here sweltering because we can't afford the a/c. Grrr!!! And I heard on the news yeaterday that ConEd is raising thier rates 22% starting next month. When is it all going to be too much???

[The Odd Broad]

I agree, Kar-Bear, it's really getting out of control.