Thoughts on Beauty

When it comes to appearance, I've always felt that women are far more forgiving than men.  Television and movies seem to support my theory: Doug and Carrie Heffernon, Fred and Wilma Flinstone, Larry and Cheryl David, Beauty and the Beast.  (I mean, come on, would that movie have turned out as rosy had Belle been a grotesque, toothless hag with a heart of gold?  At the risk of sounding cynical, something tells me no.)

Perhaps women are simply more adept at recognizing inner beauty.  And if so, is this by choice or are we wired this way?  And why are we so quick to forgive imperfections in males but cutthroat when it comes to judging other women?  Or ourselves, for that matter? 

It really chaps my ass.  Take the upcoming Sex and The City movie, for example.  With all the buzz and excitement surrounding it, I notice some other less appealing things swarming about, too.  Namely, the biting, nasty, in depth commentary regarding Sarah Jessica Parker's appearance.  It's driving me bananas.

Just what is it about this actress that makes the public feel so threatened?  Was it necessary or even remotely accurate last year when Maxim named her the Unsexiest Woman Alive?  Who were the judges behind this ruling and more importantly, what do their faces look like?  Are we to assume all of them are the very picture of symmetrical, well endowed masculine perfection?  Sadly, I suspect it boils down to nothing more than the age old fear of a successful, confident woman.  Why are we still buying into this garbage?

I am a happy, intelligent woman and even I can't help but let this crap seep under my skin from time to time.  I wonder, if I ever have a daughter, how I will go about tackling the constant bombardment of candy coated misogyny that has become the grim normality nowadays.  Is there a way to explain the existence of Girls Gone Wild while maintaining an air of dignity?  There has to be.

Forget the opinions of trashy, socially irresponsible magazines, the same goes for the comments I've seen posted after nearly every online article I've read about Sarah Jessica's new flick.  These weren't what I'd consider harmless jabs, they were bile filled, cutting digs.  I've also casually asked around and have found that many people agree.  The underlying message is ugly and clear: what right does this woman have to feel beautiful?  And what right does HBO have to expect us to consider her a sex symbol?  After all, the media is clearly supposed to dictate what is beautiful in this country...how did she slip through the cracks??!!

Which brings me to the point of this rant: What's the effing beef with Sarah Jessica Parker?  Does her appearance, unconventional by Hollywood's bizarre standards, perhaps force us to look at the imperfections in ourselves? 

I have to tell you, I have always admired SJP's beauty as something unique, intriguing and highly watchable.  I find her far more fascinating to look at than any of her costars.  She steals the show.  Cookie cutter perfection may make the vast majority of people feel safe, but it can become tiresome.  This is not to say that everyone who finds SJP unattractive is a giant, gaping asshole.  On the contrary, I'm speaking only of those who take such rancid pleasure in popping her bubble, so to speak.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, folks.  If this wasn't the case, nobody would ever get laid.  I have met plain people who I've come to find exceptionally beautiful.  By the same token, I've known stunningly gorgeous people who over time I've decided were just ok looking.  When it comes right down to it, pretty is as pretty does.  I think of the people I know: each of them lovely and individual and so very much themselves.  The people I consider to be attractive are all different shapes, sizes and colors.  There is no common trend, no definitive factor that makes them beautiful in my eyes.   

I wish for our world a collective awakening, a departure from the shallow, depthless, beauty and youth obsessed sleepwalkers we seem to be marauding around as.  They are not us.  And they are certainly not who we were born to be.

Comments

[Weinerdog]

I've never gotten the backlash against SJP either, and we both know I'm a mean girl w/ a squashed rotten tomato for a heart.

She's adorable and she can wear anything!

[Sister]

I agree.....you are a mean girl with a squashed rotten tomato for a heart...No! I just kidding Weinie....

I love SJP! She has such nice hair and I love her style. Stop the Hate!

[Weinerdog]

LaLa,

I heart you! I know you were kidding!

xoxo
Weinie

[Ma]

I'm with you about Sarah Jessica...I think she's quite beautiful and she's a great actress...not as beautiful or talented as my daughter, of course....love, me