The Beaches in Arizona

You know that wise old saying, think before you speak?  The Odd Broad hasn't quite mastered that one yet.  Sometimes I think I never will.

I once asked a cousin's (now ex) girlfriend, who happened to hail from Arizona, "How are the beaches in Arizona?"  They're still talking about that one.  In my defense, this girl wasn't much of a talker and I was strapped for conversation.  I guess I'd never really contemplated the fact that the beach is actually the ocean.  As in, the edge of our fair country.  Guess they don't call it the coast for nothing.

My husband wants to make sure I tell you about the time we were thinking of taking a trip to Canada and I told him I'd like to visit the American side.  (Niagara Falls!  I meant Niagara frigging Falls, OK?)

I really had a doosie the other day, though, while on the phone with my Sister.  We were casually discussing her pregnancy when I made a comment about the baby being able to hear singing while inside the womb.  What followed was especially cringe-worthy, even for me:

Me: "It's nice that the baby can hear music now.  The Tadpole can probably even hear me now over the phone, right?  Well, wait..."

Like most asinine statements, though, once they are spoken they can seldom be retracted.

Sissy: "What?!  If you were on speaker-phone then maybe the baby could hear you...but you're not on speaker!  Did you really just ask me if the baby could hear you through my ears, from inside my womb?"

In hindsight, I suppose yes, that is exactly what I had asked.  It hurts Sissy a little to laugh, but laugh she did.  She laughed until she almost cried.  I made her promise not to repeat this little story to anyone, not even to our own Mother.  But I suppose it's OK now that I've told you.  You won't tell anybody, right?

I'd like to add that Sissy often does put me on speaker-phone, because it makes her feel like I'm in the room with her.  Athough I suppose this doesn't alter the fact that she didn't have me on speaker that particular afternoon.

Anyways, where are you from, Dear Reader?  Do they have nice beaches there?  XOXO

Comments

[Sissy]

I am not sure the baby can hear you even if you are on speaker. I'll have to ask the doctor when I go next time. One thing is for certain--the baby cannot hear through my ears!!

[The Odd Broad]

Ya, ask the doctor. I like to think the Tadpole can hear me through the speakerphone!

[Juicybaka]

Beaches in Arizona, take a geography class why don't you for cripes sakes! Sounds like you have no idea where you are or where you are going. Do you drive? I hope not. Funny story otherwise.